“Inspired” by Apple

Santa’s personal data and privacy issues

Personal data issues seem to be a hot topic at the minute, so this seems like a good opportunity to link to this fantastic piece from 2010 by my friend Martin Sloan:

I was listening to the excellent A Christmas Gift For You from Phil Spector at the weekend, and one line in The Crystals’ cover of Santa Claus is Coming To Town caught my attention:

He’s making a list and checkin’ it twice
He’s gonna find out who’s naughty and nice

That to me sounds like processing of personal data.

Merry Christmas, everyone. I hope that the big man empties his sack down your chimney. See you in the New Year.

Patrick x

An important update to Trollem Ipsum

Inspired by Marco Arment’s excellent (and I thought very balanced) piece on his experience in a Microsoft store following the release of Surface, and what would appear to be the end of the uneasy ceasefire that has existed for the past three years between Windows users and Apple users, I am pleased to announce an important new update to Trollem Ipsum featuring both sides of the argument. Plus one for the BlackBerry L-users out there.

Apple Keynote Bingo

It’s pretty much the same as before and works in much the same way, with the bits that didn’t work taken out and some new bits added it. Some may find it boring, some may find it the best yet. Much like the iPhone 5, in fact.

Dan Lyons pretends to be a journalist

Dan Lyons (“Creator of the ‘Fake Steve’ blog”):

Apple seems less interested in blowing people away than it is in milking profit out of the existing lineup. At this Cook is doing marvellously well.

Apple has more than $100bn in cash. Its market value of $632bn makes it the biggest company in the world, bigger than any company in US history.

That’s great for Apple’s shareholders. But for customers, who cares? In terms of products, Apple has become the one thing it should never be. Apple has become boring.

To break the “fourth wall” for a minute, on this site, I make out like I actually care about whether Apple or Samsung copied from Braun or themselves or whatever. Let me make this quite clear - if you spend your life as a barely functioning ball of rage due the injustice of Apple ripping off consumers, or because Samsung is stealing designs from Apple, then you need to get a fucking life.

Then this fuckstick comes along and writes such an obvious piece of linkbait, lacking in any form of journalistic merit, that I get Actually Live Angry Out Loud. Shame on the BBC for publishing such a sheer unadulterated piece of self-serving propaganda.

What we know about the iPhone 5: Rumours round-up and your new Apple Keynote Bingo playing card

1. The best iPhone yet!

2. A new dock connector. Possibly. And the headphone socket is in a different place. Maybe. This stuff is important.

3. A screen that, due to some more pixels, or possibly witchcraft, is bigger than before. I know. Incredible, isn’t it.

4. A multiplier more faster!

5. Thinner than YOU CAN POSSIBLY IMAGINE.

6. Something something something catching up with Android something something.

7. Better camera for Republican senators to take photos of their “gerrymanders” and then post them on Grindr, to then claim that they were “just looking for an Aerobie partner”.

8. Can kill a man with its bare hands.

9. Chops, peels, slices and dices all in one!

10. Does exactly what it says on the tin.

11. Will sleep with your wife, given half a chance.

12. Will sleep with your mother, and won’t even ask.

13. Makes you stunningly attractive to members of your preferred sex (this is Apple - some of you are bound to be gay.)

14. Separates and lifts, giving the impression of size.

15. More droppable then ever before.

At least one of these might be true. You can find more at the new and improved Apple Keynote Bingo. Don’t forget to read the instructions.

The Verge tries to explain the different versions of Office 2013

Tom Warren:

Microsoft is offering a number of different Office 2013 editions aimed at home users and businesses. Office 365, the company’s software plus services platform for Office, will power Office 2013 as a subscription service for those who want to avoid the up-front costs of a perpetual license and take advantage of some of the on-demand features. Available in Home Premium, Small Business Premium, Pro Plus, and Enterprise — Office 365 has a variety of offerings that are flexible based on needs, but like many of its other products there’s still no one size that fits all. The new Home Premium product allows a family to install Office 2013 on up to five PCs and get an additional 20GB of online SkyDrive storage to share documents online. Home Premium includes access to Word, PowerPoint, Excel, Outlook, OneNote, Access, and Publisher through an Internet-connected Windows 7 or Windows 8 PC. Documents and settings, and even the actual apps will roam across whatever PC you choose to use Office 365 with. Other editions, like ProPlus and above, include additional user accounts and access to apps like InfoPath and Lync — designed for businesses. Office 365 will also include access to Office for Mac.

The bit that PC manufacturers don’t steal from Apple

Farhad Manjoo, writing for PandoDaily:

I know what you’re going to say: You’ve got a Windows laptop and your trackpad works perfectly. The Zenbook is an exception. Other PC laptops aren’t so bad.

I don’t believe you.

He’s absolutely right. It is an endless source of fascination to me (here also here) (and others) why PC manufacturers cannot steal the best bit of every Apple laptop since 2008.

(Incidentally, although I enjoyed this article, I find Manjoo’s writing for PandoDaily a bit linkbaity.)